Good Morning! Or afternoon. Or whatever. Welcome to this week's Things to Do, hosted and written by me.
A quick glance down this list will show that I’ve proper struggled this week – there’s not much going on really. I think everyone has just grabbed hold of the Christmas bandwagon and won’t let go until the 3rd Jan.
Anyway, if you can pry yourself away from those Yorkshire Pudding wraps in the Christmas Markets you might be interested in one of the following…
Big Lebowski 20th Anniversary Party at The Deaf Institute
Friday 16th November
Ever since its release in 1998, millions of fellas, typically with terrible facial hair, a massive darby and a fedora have tried to replicate all aspects of ‘The Dude’. Sitting around in a dressing gown, drinking White Russians and generally being as chilled as fuck became the life goals of many a male, but there was one glaring problem standing in their way – they weren’t Jeff Bridges. One of the coolest men alive, Jeff fucking Bridges was in Tron for fuck’s sake – you can’t get cooler than that. Well, I suppose plenty of people will give it a try at this Big Lebowski night at the Deaf Institute. Looks like fun.
Urban Narnia at Hatch
From Friday 16th November
This isn’t just an event for this week, this is going on right up until Christmas, but I’ve included it in this week’s roundup because it’s only just opened and you should go. Urban Narnia at Hatch is exactly what it sounds like – a Christmas wonderland that transports you all the way to Narnia, except in reality it’s under the Mancunian Way and they don’t accept buttons as currency. They’ve basically doubled the size of Hatch, it’s massive now, and they’ve added 10 new retail units, as well as a Cottonopolis bit that serves up their amazing Japanese Junk menu, and a double decker Electrik pop-up featuring darts, arcade machines, a balcony and some top, top beers.
Chorlton Book Festival
From Friday 16th November
It can sometimes be hard to actually live your life and still do some reading. Things always seem to get in the way, be it a big piss up after work, the latest Netflix binger or a cheeky bit of experimental naughty time on a Tuesday night. That’s probably why it’s a good idea to get involved in a book club, so you can read through the prism of ‘not letting people down’ or attending book festivals like this one in Chorlton this week. They’ve got a packed week of events, talking to all manner of authors, writers, readers and even the odd super nerd. So have a look, head down and pick up that half read copy of 50 Shades again.
Deptford Northern Soul Club #1 at Yes
Saturday 17th November
It’s all about YES at the moment isn’t it. People just won’t shut up about it. Our photographer Creeseburger, bloody good bloke, is always in there. Our contributors only ever want to write about it now, and even James Barker – a man who struggles to get out of Didsbury every morning – has been there recently. I think it’s safe to say that they’re smashing it, and in fact they may be doing even better by Saturday because one of their events has managed to ensnare my attention – something that is notoriously difficult to do. They’ve got a Northern Soul night on and it looks bloody brilliant. Grab the talcum powder, pop on your DMs and I’ll see you on the dancefloor.
Simon Donald – Him off The Viz
Saturday 17th November
As part of the Chorlton Book Festival they’ve managed to secure themselves a living legend – Simon Donald off of The Viz. What’s the Viz? What’s the Viz? The Viz is just the greatest publication of all time – responsible for such literary masterpieces as Sid The Sexist, The Fat Slags and of course – Buster Gonad, who has to carry his bollocks around in a wheelbarrow because they’re so big. So Simon’s going to head down to The Edge Theatre in Chorlton and probably tell some jokes, natter about the magazine and probably just generally be a bloody decent bloke. It’s only 12 quid too, so you’d be a sod to miss out.
Matthew Bourne’s Swan Lake
From Tuesday 20th November
When it comes to something I know absolutely bob-all about I typically start the paragraph with “I must admit…” Well, I must admit that this is because I usually try and distract all of my 2 readers from the simple fact that I don’t know what I’m talking about, so I’ll make some random, outrageous claim before adding a sentence about the event at the end. Well, this piece is exactly that, because Matthew Bourne’s Swan Lake is so completely out of my realm of knowledge that I wouldn’t even know where to begin. I think it’s about swans. And a lake.
Distilled Masterclass at Brasserie Abode: Buffalo Trace Bourbon
Wednesday 21st November
The latest in Brasserie Abode’s Distilled Masterclasses, this week sees Buffalo Trace Bourbon turn up to peddle their whiskey, as guests sit down with a 5 course dinner and 5 paired cocktails alongside some bumf from a Buffalo Trace expert. These events are usually a right god laugh, with plenty of top food and top bevvies – if you’re not stumbling through the door on the way out then you’ve not done it right. Also, I will personally be attending this one so if you want to punch me in the face – this is your chance.
Thursday 22nd November
One for all of you budding Evel Knievel fans out there – this show at the Nynex Arena contains grit, ramps, jumps, bikes, helmets and deliciously tight leather trousers – as well as potentially some smashed ligaments, shattered bones and even the very high chance of death. That’s right, these mental heads will be flinging their bikes around a specially created track, jumping up ramps, doing flips and wheelies all for your enjoyment. So grab a big hot dog, a few pints of flat beer, one of those novelty foam hands and enjoy yourself. You deserve it.