Independence Day at Sandinista
The 4th of July is the day that all Americans celebrate gaining independence from us disgusting Brits and so they typically buy a shit load of fireworks, sink hundreds of beers and shout ‘USA!, USA!, USA!’ for the entire 24 hour period. There’s probably some serious gun shooting too – mostly into the air and not at each other. It’s been and gone now though so if you were looking to unleash your inner Uncle Sam then you’re shit out of luck. Or perhaps not because Sandinista are having an Independence party this Friday as part of their American Tap Takeover and it promises to be as American as Apple Pie at Disneyland. There will be some top-notch US beers of offer, beer pong, and best of all – FREE American inspired tapas. Lovely.
Football is Coming Home
Saturday 7th July
I heard from a friend who I don’t see very often that football is coming home. I’m not sure where it’s been but it’s ready to grab all of its belongings, wrap it into a bindle and head back home to see its mam. It seems everyone is really happy about this because I’m hearing everyone talking about it at the moment, including one homeless fella on Piccadilly Gardens who didn’t have a shirt but happened to know the score against Columbia even though you can’t look through the window of Dixons to watch it anymore. We’re facing Sweden on Saturday in the Quarter Finals and pretty much every establishment in the city will be showing it. Even Gregg’s. Probably. There’s Black Dog NWS, Dive NQ, La Bandera, Bunny Jackson’s, Second City – they’re all banging it out. As long as it doesn’t go to pennies again it should be enjoyable.
The Twisted Wheel Club All Nighter
Saturday 7th July
It was sometime in the 60’s when the Twisted Wheel started and pretty much straight away it cemented itself as revolutionary – bringing obscure and underground soul from Detroit to the dingy, dark recesses of post-Industrial Manchester. People would flock from all over to come and dance on some talcum powder, show off their new threads and generally have a bloody good time away from grafting in a shitty factory. Probably the most legendary events were the All Nighters and this weekend sees it return, in a slightly different location but with the same tunes, moves and message. Night People will be hosting ‘The Twisted Wheel Club All Nighter’ and I’ve got 4 tickets in my hand right now. If you want them, the first person to email me can have them.
ShinDigger Sessions presents Block Party II
Saturday 7th July
As part of Manchester Beer Week, local brewers ShinDigger have got together with a bunch of other people to put on a big street party on that bit down the side of the Green Quarter. Teaming up with Redbank Cafe, Three Rivers Gin and Reform Radio, they’re all putting on a big party that will include gin, beer, food and music – pretty much the key ingredients of any ‘shindig’. Tickets are £7 and they’ll get you access to all the merriment you could ever want, and I presume that you will be able to sup a shit load of them Mango beers that ShinDigger do which are fucking amazing. The sun will obviously be out too so wear sun cream because I’ve definitely burnt my stupid little face today.
George Clinton & Parliament Funkadelic at Manchester Academy
Saturday 7th July
This gig will be George Clinton’s last ever appearance in the UK and so it’s going to be extra, extra special. Extra special because not only is George a true funk legend, but he’s managed to surround himself with a gang who are not only just as creative as him, but they’re also as batshit crazy as he is. The stage will feature one bloke who just jumps around wearing a massive nappy, pimp hats, spaceships, afros, tits, teeth, sparkles and whatever else you can dream up while taking acid in a hot bath. The guy is a fucking legend, I’ll be there and the music is amazing – what else do you need from your Saturday night? Buy a kebab on the way home and everything will be perfect.
Manchester Eats Festival 2018
Saturday 7th – Sunday 8th July
I think it’s clear that the people of Manchester enjoy their food. Not only do they get involved in a lovely bit of Manchester’s Finest action, there’s also a slew of competitors, bloggers, Myspace enthusiasts and writers out there who get loads of attention if they take a good video of a juicy burger. Good news then because this weekend sees the first ever Manchester Eats festival hit Heaton Park and there’s so many events going on throughout the two days that I can’t be arsed listing them here. You can expect some of the city’s biggest and best restaurants to be showing off their prowess, some proper celebrity chef demonstrations and loads of things for your little under-developed gargoyles to get involved in. Marco Pierre White will also be doing his first cookery demonstration in about 10 years so that should be very exciting. I’ll be knocking about too so if you see me and want to buy me a Prosecco from the Prosecco tent – I won’t stop you.
Summer BBQ at Hatch
Saturday 7th July
BBQ’s as a kid usually involved heading round to my grandma’s house in Derker on a sunny day in August and getting to see 12 grown men all try and show off in front of an open flame and some Farmfoods meat. They were always a massive occasion, with a huge buffet on display featuring cheese and pineapple on sticks, potato salad and my grandmas homemade coleslaw which packed about 2000 calories into every teaspoon. My uncle Dave would usually end up slumped in the beer shed, dribbling and snarling at any of us kids that got too close, but it was always a jolly good day. Nowadays though we’ve got access to even better open-flame experiences, as Hatch put on a big BBQ day this Saturday featuring live music, the footy on the big screen, sunshine and special BBQ menus from their current street food vendors. Music will be supplied by Zacc Rogers as well as DJ sets from legend Pasta Paul.
Albert’s Schloss Le Grand Depart & Tour de Manchester
Sunday 8th July
Pretty much everyone hates cyclists. If you’re a pedestrian and want to cross the road, you hate cyclists. If you’re a driver and you want to drive fast so you’re not late for your rubbish job in the morning, you hate cyclists. If you’re a cyclist and you just want to ride about because it’s too expensive and sweaty on the bus, you hate other cyclists. Nobody can win. Everyone hates the other until we all end up in a calamity of lycra, bad ales, performance enhancing drugs and bikes that cost 3 grand. Well this Sunday it’s time to put all of this aside as Albert’s Schloss launch their Cycling month with the Tour de Manchester – a 22km trek around the suburbs which anyone can get involved in. You get a nice sausage butty before you start and when you get back in – some lovely, lovely beer. The weather is going to be nice so if you fancy a ride – get involved. Leave the lycra at home though.
A Celebration of the Music from The Lord of The Rings, Game of Thrones and The Hobbit
Thursday 12th July
Even if you’re not a fan of goblins or dragons, there’s no escaping the impressive musical talents of all them people that were involved in them fantasy films and TV shows listed above. I mean some of the tunes in Lord of the Rings alone can evoke a serious bit of emotion in my head within the first few notes, especially that one where Gandalf rides down a fucking mountain to save the day at the Battle of Helms Deep. Or the bit where Sean Bean dies. Best take some Kleenex then because the music of LOTR, GOT and The Hobbit (TH?) is coming to the Bridgewater Hall this week. A big orchestra and even a choir will be bashing out all the hits – just try not to cry too much.
